Remember ol’ Dad this Sunday

Father’s Day is coming up this Sunday, June 17.  And, just like in the issue prior to Mother’s Day in May, I’ve found a little humor to share with you.  To you other dads out there and even your children, some of these may be familiar:
Dadisms –
“You’re going to sit there until you eat your dinner. I don’t care if you sit there all night.” (Substitute ‘dinner’ for ‘peas’, ‘corn’, ‘mother’s cooking’, etc.)
“Delayed obedience is disobedience. “  (One of my personal favorites)
“When I say no, I mean no. Why? Because, that’s why.”(Another one)
“If you don’t stop crying, I’ll give you something to cry about.”
“Two wrongs do not make a right.”
“As long as you tried your hardest, that’s all that matters.” (Yoda said “Do or do not, there is no try” in Star Wars)
“I’m spanking you because I love you. This hurts me a lot more than it hurts you.” (Or, “this is going to hurt you a lot more than it hurts me.)
“If I didn’t hear it, you didn’t say it! “ (My kids use this line on ME)
“Shape up or ship out.”
“Turn off the _____ (TV, iPad, iPod, Wii, XBox, Playstation, PSP, etc.) before it melts your brain.”
“We’ll do it the right way. My way.”
“Don’t ask me, ask your mother.”
“This is your last warning. “ (5 minutes later…) “THIS is your last warning.”
“You’ll realize the value of money once you start earning. “ (Or, once the taxes come out of your first pay check)
“Son, don’t ever get married. And tell that to your kids.”
“Enough is enough! “
“Do what I say, not what I do.”
“When I was your age…. “
Borrowed from http://www.theholidayspot.com/fathersday/humor.htm
I’m truly looking forward to another great Father’s Day with my children and wife, who have all been very merciful and gracious to me over the past year.  
Joe Buck Coates

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